Can we really change?

Our lives can be pretty messy and chaotic. Consumed with the never-ending to-do lists in the form of scribbled-on calendars or journal entries that we use to try to add some sort of semblance or organization in our lives.

Because life is so crazy, we find ways to inject predictability and routine into the mix. When things fall into place with a usual, expected pattern, it lessens our anxiety and gives us more of a sense of control over our lives.

We can now breathe and let go more easily, but with these same routines and that predictability in place, it will grant us the mental space and energy we need to manage all of the random things that more than likely will happen.

But here’s the problem with predictability and routine: it doesn’t challenge us.

When we fall into a groove with something without so much of a challenge, we find it easy to repeat it and integrate it as a habit. And unless or until something changes to interrupt that habit, things are simple. There’s little-to-no challenge involved, and everything is pretty much manageable.

So why is that an issue? Or why might we want to build more challenges into our lives?

"Because what doesn’t challenge you won’t change you."

If you don’t have challenges to face and risks of failure to confront, you won’t change. When your habits and things that control your life are predictable, there’s really no need for you to step up your game. You already know what to expect and how to react, and what to do. There’s no reason to do things differently.

But if we don’t change, that also means we won’t improve. We need change in order to grow and become better versions of ourselves. We can’t develop very much as people by holding onto the reins of certainty and stability and never testing our limits.

When we face challenges, we’re called to adapt and change in some way. Challenges can be a pain and involve a certain degree of difficulty, or they really wouldn’t be all that “challenging” in the first place, right?

These challenges more than often call for problem-solving and creative thinking. Sometimes they even require us to insert new people or activities into our lives. We proactively make the choice to invite them in.

For example, this year, I set another goal to eat healthier. I have been comfortable for the past year after losing 35 lbs. and feeling comfortable in my own skin, so why do I need to make this change? My clothes fit me, I am healthy, why do anything more? Well, the obvious reason is for my health, but after a year of watching what I eat, exercising, and monitoring my caloric intake, what's the point? I am healthy and happy. I was bored with my same routine and never thought maybe I needed to change things up a bit.

What I did know was that if I stopped exercising and started back eating all that crap I was eating before, I would gain all my weight back and not be as healthy as I am now. I honestly did kind of fall off of my routine, kind of sort of.... well, yes, I did! I am not where I was a year ago, but I am also not progressing. I do not feel as energetic, and I was finding myself not as committed to daily exercising.

So, a couple of weeks ago, I started my process over but with a few tweaks.

With my newfound routine started and I feel great. I have my energy back, and I know this has to be a part of my daily routine, but I changed it up. I'm doing things a bit differently, which motivates me. I actually learned how to eat healthier without feeling like I am missing out on what I love to eat. I am West Indian, and what West Indian does not like bread or rice? I run in the mornings now, so I feel different, have more energy, and have a better outlook on my day because I am starting off my day differently.

Now, all of this isn’t to say that creating changes in your life or altering your routines is easy, painless, or even necessarily enjoyable. But in the end, my point is this: challenges enable us to change and grow.

And if we can learn to give ourselves more opportunities to confront challenges and make the most of them when they naturally arise by facing them head-on with strength and grace, we can often find or create a silver lining within them. Challenges give us the chance to become something more, something much greater. Maybe even something pretty damn incredible!

If you have that motivation, even a little bit, and you can see the changes...but you still need help moving forward, someone to hold you accountable, reach out to us for help. Sometimes there are obstacles that you may or may not be aware of but when confronted with them, you find it difficult to go around. What changes or improvements are you currently trying to make, right now? Life changes are about seeing your vision, making moves, and taking steps toward a better you!

Nancy Phillips